Nate Rates: The Thursday Murder Club

Richard Osman’s nostalgia filled series about pensioners solving crimes has been a smash hit, turning him from a semi-famous presenter to a genuinely powerful figure in the entertainment industry. So it’s no surprise that a screen adaptation was rushed into the works, produced by Amblin and distributed on Netflix.

And rushed feels like the right word. Having not read the books, I can’t comment on whether they were worth adapting in the first place (though I have my suspicions) but two hours is simply not enough to give us any kind of investment in these characters. Their interplay should be the thing that keeps us coming back for more, but the film is so busy trying to rush through a mass of plots and backstory that it feels like we never get to spend any real time with them. 

Any chance of warm feeling towards them is further scuppered by a truly awful script. It’s not just that the exposition is boring and obvious – it’s actively repetitive. Scenes end by the characters summarising exactly what they’ve already said…in the same scene. It’s the epitome of talking down to the audience – not only are we not trusted to read between the lines, the filmmakers don’t believe we can remember the lines that have actually been said. 

The cast is fine enough, and bring some much needed shine to proceedings. Helen Mirren is steely, Ben Kingsley is sweetly awkward and Pierce Brosnan is charming when not putting on a terrible cockney accent. But it’s hard to really care about them, or the mystery they’re wrapped up in. 

Ironically, the subplot about a cold case turns out to be far more interesting than the main mystery. It raises pertinent questions about the meaning of justice – an intriguing dilemma that ends up clashing with the main characters’ treatment of the perpetrators.

Maybe it all would have worked better as a miniseries. Maybe it was never going to work at all. But whatever secret sauce has made the book series so popular has not made the transition to live action.

4/10

Nat Reviews | August roundup

The Ballad of Wallis Island

A cynical folk singer gets trapped on a remote island with a devoted fan in this sad, sweet dramedy from Tom Basden and Tim Key. Whilst it could lean into the stalker-ish psychological horror of Stephen King’s Misery (which even gets referenced), The Ballad of Wallis Island is less interested in our parasocial relationship with celebrities than an inability to let go of the past. For Key’s character, the folk musician’s songs remind him of a better time, whilst for Basden’s lanky singer-songwriter, wearing clothes several sizes too small for him, it’s a chance for him to get back together with his former romantic/musical partner (Carey Mulligan). There are occasions where the sentiment is slightly too on the nose, but Basden’s persistent impetuousness and Key’s never-ending barrage of terrible jokes stop it veering too far into mawkishness. The score is also fantastic, with Basden and Mulligan’s voices harmonising magnificently, a fittingly melancholy soundtrack to this strange little film. 

Fantastic 4: First Steps

There’s been no shortage of reboots, but this one feels more welcome than many. The Fantastic Four have always struggled to make the transition to the big screen – the Noughties movies are charming in a goofy, dated kind of way, whilst Fant4stic practically killed director Josh Trank’s previously promising career. With Marvel’s First Family coming to the MCU (sort of), there was plenty of hype that they might finally get the team right.

Luckily, First Steps has a crystal clear vision of what role each member of the family should play, cannily avoiding some of the traps that can alienate audiences to these characters, created in the 1960s. Reed is no longer coldly calculating – his ability to envision the worst is depicted as a heightened form of anxiety, which he is helpless to resist. Only Sue’s level-headed thinking keeps the family together.

Meanwhile, Ben Grimm has accepted his rocky exterior, allowing Ebon Moss-Bachrach to explore his warmer, softer side. But it’s Joseph Quinn’s Human Torch who has changed the most – no longer a shallow, obnoxious womaniser, he’s exuberant, passionate but still caring.

The film around them sometimes struggles, with the cosmic nature of the story necessitating vague stakes and dubious special effects, but the pitch-perfect characterisation of the central four ensures it always feels emotionally grounded. The writers waste little time in setting up the central dilemma, poking at the familial bonds that make this team unique amongst all the other super-teams. For all its world-ending stakes and supernaturally handsome cast, First Steps’ greatest trick is making this collection of geniuses, astronauts and explorers relatable.

8/10

Superman (2025)

James Gunn’s new Superman movie has a lot riding on it. Not only does it have to silence the legions of Snyder-cultists baying for blood, but it also has to establish a connected cinematic universe, something DC have been trying and failing to do for over a decade. 

Luckily, David Corenswet’s shoulders seem broad enough to bear the burden. His Superman is an enthusiastic Labrador, in love with the world around him but struggling to comprehend its evils. 

His chemistry with Rachel Brosnahan’s Lois Lane grounds the film, their flirtations at the Daily Planet hinting at the ideological gap between them. Gunn uses Lois as a mouthpiece to challenge Superman, asking if he has the right to interfere in the affairs of mankind (and then write about himself as Clark Kent). He also makes a few notable additions to the Man of Steel’s lore that can’t be revealed without spoilers, forcing Clark to confront his own values.

All of which makes Superman sound very doom-and-gloomy, but it’s very much not. Gunn understands that in order to move past debates over whether Superman’s simplistic morality is outdated, he must first confront them. This version of Superman isn’t perfect, but he does love helping people. The problem lies more with us than him. 

There is, admittedly, a lot of exposition required, particularly in the early stages. Gunn rattles through alternate history and character motivations like he’s got a checklist, but things settle down a bit once we understand the stakes, and we get some nice character beats. Bringing in C-Listers like Green Lantern, Metamorpho and Mr Terrific could have been a risk, but space is given to ensure they each get their moment in the sun. Not only do these characters add colour to this new universe, but they also highlight alternate versions of heroism, again serving as idealistic foils to Big Blue. 

Of course, Superman’s primary foil is Lex Luthor, here played by Nicholas Hoult. Where the character may have once seemed implausibly evil, the rise of technocrats like Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos now make him seem more relevant than ever. Hoult manages to showcase the slick, corporate shark and the petulant man-baby beneath, ruthlessly sacrificing lives to prove his superiority. His face-offs with Superman feel genuinely charged, neither side willing to back down.

It’s not a perfect film. Like every Superman story, it struggles to provide a genuine threat without losing sight of the stakes, and the climax does end up feeling a little meaningless. But as a manifesto for the Man of Steel, it’s incredibly persuasive, highlighting his compassion and optimism, in stark contrast to Henry Cavill’s brooding, misanthropic portrayal. It’s early days, but if Gunn can carry on in this vein, then DC’s future looks bright.

8/10

Duned to Failure? Denis Villeneuve to direct next Bond film

It’s been announced. Denis Villeneuve will be directing the next Bond film. Or at least he’s contracted to. That does not necessarily mean he will, as the past shows. 

Villeneuve is a strong choice. He’s got a reputation for being able to craft powerful, moving, layered stories in both independent and blockbuster films. With both Dune and Blade Runner, he has successfully made films frequently deemed un-filmable, fitting his own narrative voice into the requirements of the relevant franchise. 

He has everything needed to make a great Bond film. He’s got experience filming tense action scenes, most notably the highway ambush in Sicario. He’s used to pulling brilliant performances from A-List talent including Ryan Gosling, Timothée Chalamet and Emily Blunt. He can provide thrills without sacrificing depth. 

The question is not can he make a great Bond film – the question is will the studio let him create a great Bond film? For all its prestige, the Bond franchise is not necessarily a place that auteurs have thrived. Scores of first class filmmakers like Steven Spielberg, Christopher Nolan and Quentin Tarantino have expressed an interest in directing 007, but none have ever been given the reins to the prestigious franchise. Only one genuine auteur has ever directed a Bond film, with Sam Mendes helming the uber-successful Skyfall and the notably less successful SPECTRE. Even he expressed a sense of fatigue at the end of the press tour for SPECTRE, suggesting that it’s something of a no-win scenario – either people hate the film, or you’re trapped in another five year cycle of pre-production, filming and endless grilling from the media. 

And even a signed contract is no guarantee. Danny Boyle, director of Trainspotting, Slumdog Millionaire and 28 Days Later, signed on to direct No Time To Die, only to leave before filming started, citing creative differences. His script was scrapped, and the virtually unknown Cary Joji Fukunaga was bought on to create a film that aligned more with the vision of Daniel Craig and the producers. 

And the omens are not good for Villeneuve. He’s still due to release Dune: Messiah at some point, effectively stalling any progress on Bond for at least another couple of years. Meanwhile, the Broccoli family, long-time producers of the 007 franchise, have given in and sold the rights to Amazon, leading to uncertainty in the fandom. 

Ironically, the latter might actually prove to be useful. Amazon have bought in Amy Pascal, the woman behind the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies, to produce – she’s already comfortable wrangling the complexities of putting distinctive voices in charge of one of the world’s most famous characters. 

Villeneuve can, and hopefully will, make a good Bond movie. But it’s not over until the curtain rises. Until then, there’ll be plenty of choices, compromises and criticisms in store for him, and plenty of waiting for the rest of us. 

Nat Reviews | June 2025

The Phoenician Scheme

Wes Anderson draws a lot of flack (sometimes from me) for the saminess of some of his films. His particular style of cutesy symmetry works best when it’s driven by something, be it a tale of dysfunctional family or a high-octane caper. Luckily, The Phoenician Scheme has both, as the amoral arms dealer Zsa-Zsa Korda (Benicio Del Toro), in fear of a successful assassination attempt, tries to rebuild his relationship with his daughter Liesl (Mia Threapleton). There’s something of Tintin in this not quite-globetrotting adventure, as the two go from one exotic locale to the other. As always, there’s a sea of notable cameos – Richard Ayoade is particularly well utilised, and Benedict Cumberbatch gets to be more menacing than he has in years – but it’s Benicio del Toro’s unrelenting determination that drives the film. Any Wes Anderson picture is likely to draw unfavourable comparisons to his masterpiece The Grand Budapest Hotel, but this is certainly better than some of his more recent efforts.

7/10

Predator: Killer of Killers

Prey (2022) revitalised the Predator franchise with one simple idea – pit the titular alien hunter against human warriors from the past. Killer of Killers takes that idea to its logical conclusion, telling an anthology tale throughout history of people force to face the predator. Those people include a Viking warrior, a samurai and a WW2 fighter pilot. The film pays real tribute to their respective cultures and languages, a major strength of Prey, and the action itself is as viscerally bloody as any live-action rumble. The animation is, for the most part, aesthetically pleasing, only occasionally lapsing into the uncanny valley of video game cutscenes. The biggest problem is one that has dogged the franchise since its first sequel. With every new predator that’s introduced and subsequently dispatched, the aliens start to seem less like unstoppable gladiators and more like wealthy tourists posing with the corpses of dead animals. Killer of Killers is an enjoyable sci-fi actioner, but it risks diluting the terror that so enthralled audiences back in the eighties.

6/10

Havoc

You can say a lot of things about Havoc, but you can’t claim it failed to live up to its title. Gareth Edwards’ latest film is a cacophony of gunfire, blood squibs split allegiances. After a crime boss’ son is implicated in a gangland shooting, corrupt cop Patrick Walker (Tom Hardy) is tasked with finding him and bringing him back safe. Edwards’ previous films, The Raid and its sequel, raised the bar for action cinema, and the choreography of the close-quarters combat scenes is impeccable. Unfortunately, most of the action is more generic brand of gun-fu which pushes the boundaries of plausibility, with all the consistency of an Eton Mess. Eventually it starts to feel more like a chore than a thrill, like watching someone else play through several levels of a particularly repetitive first-person shooter. This occurs in an unnamed, supposedly American, city that looks like a mix between Swansea and CGI-monstrosity. Even Hardy struggles to bring anything new to the role of rogue cop, although the scenes of him viciously interrogating people of colour whilst hiding behind his badge feel queasy. Edwards and Hardy have both proven their merit in the action genre, which is what makes this greyish slog such a disappointment.

5/10

K-Pop Demon Hunters

This bright, brash bubblegum of a film is better than its straight-to-streaming status would suggest. The name gives it all away, following a trio of K-pop stars who hunt demons in their spare time. The visuals are fun, designed to be easily gifable and clippable, and an impressive amount of work has gone into making the songs as catchy as their real life counterparts. The soundtrack includes ballads, takedowns and girl-power anthems, all of them convincingly performed by the cast with some excellent choreography. The story is serviceable, but there’s a sense every line of dialogue is just killing time whilst we wait for the next dance number. K-Pop Demon Hunters never really becomes more than its title suggests, but then it doesn’t really need to.

6/10 

Batman Ninja vs. the Yakuza League

A follow up to the extremely silly Batman Ninja, which saw the Caped Crusader and his villains transported back in time to feudal Japan, this sequel ups the ante by revealing that due to the timeline being corrupted, the Justice League have now become Yakuzas. Anyone thinking the filmmakers might try to play this premise straight didn’t see the first one – Japan is floating in the sky above Gotham, leading to the occasional yakuza tornado (yes, you heard that right). The creative visuals are the film’s primary strength, particularly the playful redesigns of the Justice League – get ready for a Superman wearing aviator shades and Green Lantern wearing a kimono. There are moments of gleeful goofiness, with a few changes in animation style and an ongoing gag about ‘science ninja techniques.’ But there’s just not enough there to sustain an hour and a half of runtime, with one-dimensional characters and baffling stakes, and none of the novelty of the first film. There’s fun to be had, but it’s a punishing experience for anyone paying close attention.

4/10

Nat Reviews | May 2025

Thunderbolts*

Ghost (Hannah John-Kamen), Bob (Lewis Pullman), John Walker (Wyatt Russell), Alexei Shostakov/Red Guardian (David Harbour), Yelena Belova (Florence Pugh) and Bucky Barnes (Sebastian Stan)in Marvel Studios’ THUNDERBOLTS*. Photo by Chuck Zlotnick. © 2025 MARVEL.

It’s been a hot minute since Marvel made a good movie, with the newest Captain America film proving to be a disappointment. Just when all were about to lose hope, though, comes Thunderbolts*, a solidly crafted story of a pack of loveable misfits, made by filmmakers with genuine talent. Very little here is likely to reinvent the wheel, but the sheer effort put in to the film feels almost revolutionary to Marvel. There is a genuine desire to make a good film, not just a willingness to churn out two hours of slop as cheaply as possible, safe in the knowledge that it will still make money. Here, the green screens are invisible. The stunts are well choreographed, and, wherever possible, practical. And some of the characters are genuinely interesting, with Marvel leaning into the Thunderbolts’ murky sense of morality. Sure, there are still issues – David Harbour’s in it far too much, with his broad Russian accent and even broader sense of humour. And compared to some of its more original competitors, it’s clear Marvel remains years behind. But then pioneering was never what the studio did best. Look back at Phase One, and you see a studio that made an art out of creating consistently solid, fun films with likeable protagonists. The Marvel logo became a stamp of quality, a guarantee that a film would be entertaining, if nothing else. And who knows? If they manage to replicate the success of Thunderbolts*, maybe Marvel’s golden age will come again.

7/10

Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning

And so it is here. The final Mission: Impossible. 8 films and 25 years worth of defying stunts have all led to this one moment. 

At least, that’s what we’re told, again and again, until it starts to feel more like brainwashing than raising the stakes. The first hour frequently calls back to the previous films in the franchise (including some particularly egregious examples of lazily reusing footage) – at least when characters aren’t throwing themselves at Tom Cruise’s feet and begging him to save them. At one point he is even dubbed the chosen one, in a gobsmackingly unsubtle example of vanity filmmaking at its worst. 

This is something that Cruise and his right hand man, director Christopher McQuarrie, have done before, trying to build a continuous narrative through a film series that has been defined by a kind of joyous inconsistency. It’s always seemed like an odd choice, too. Nobody watches Mission: Impossible for the plot, or even, really the characters. We watch it for the tone, the thrills, and of course, the spectacular stunts that only Cruise would be crazy enough to do himself. 

Withholding this from the audience, in favour of dreary exposition and dialogue so bad it sounds like it belongs in a Scientology commercial, is deeply frustrating. Is this really how we go out? Not with a bang, but a whimper?

Thankfully, though, Cruise’s desire to shock is almost as strong as his need to stroke his own ego. Whilst the bouts of dialogue are dreary, there are two genuinely jaw-dropping, bravura set pieces that rank amongst the best in action cinema. A scene set on a submarine conveys the clumsiness, the stress, the sheer insanity of scuba diving better than 100 safety briefings ever could. The finale demonstrates just how brilliant Cruise and co are at weaving plot threads together to create multiple, simultaneous countdowns.

Those two scenes alone are worth the price of admission. But they also can’t hide that Cruise has too much control over this franchise, and not enough self-awareness. Sitting through this a second time felt physically painful. I’m not saying I would never watch it again. But the fast-forward button might get worn out.

6/10

Nat Reviews: April 2025 roundup

Easter’s been a busy time for me, but cinema never rests. While there’s plenty of new releases for me to catch up on in the future (watch this space) I did manage to watch two sultry, sweaty thrillers from brilliant contemporary directors.

Motel Destino

A sweaty, claustrophobic erotic thriller, Brazilian director Karim Aïnouz revels in the sordid nature of Motel Destino’s setting; a dilapidated sex motel, utilised by locals looking for a place to hook up and indulge their deepest fantasies. Hiding out after a botched assassination attempt, lowlife Heraldo finds himself embroiled in the tense relationship between the owner, Elias, and his wife Dayana. There’s no holding back here, with graphic sex scenes and a preening performance from Fábio Assunção as Elias. If erotic thrillers are your thing, this is a must watch, and though it’s not how I get my kicks, I can appreciate the craft at work here. 

7/10

Sinners

Ryan Coogler’s return to original moviemaking after a stint working on the Creed and Black Panther franchises is a reminder of what made him such an exciting filmmaker in the first place. Set in 1930s Mississippi, Sinners sees two twins (both played by Michael B. Jordan) trying to hold a grand opening for their new juke joint, aimed at the black community who are excluded from white clubs. Unfortunately, the arrival of the vampiric Remmick (Jack O’Connell) turns a celebratory night into an under-siege story. Coogler uses vampires to explore how colonialism slowly drains black culture of its life, a point made eloquently by composer Ludwig Göransson’s score, which combines contemporary pop, delta blues and Irish folk music. At times the story feels a little cliched, and some of the vampire effects look a little goofy, but the ending wraps it up so beautifully that it’s hard to complain. It might not be quite as good as Creed, but Coogler seems to have found a new lease on life away from Marvel.

8/10

Nat Reviews | March 2025

What a month it’s been. There’ve been some great films. There’ve been some terrible films. And there was one of the best films I’ve seen in my life. Truly, March Madness doesn’t just happen in basketball.

The Gorge

This Apple TV original tries to combine horror, action and romance, with mixed results. Miles Teller’s sniper is hired to watch over a mysterious gorge, from which come the nightmarish Hollow Men. On the other side lies his Russian counterpart, played by Anya Taylor-Joy. Despite communication between them being forbidden, they develop a relationship using signs, slowly discovering more about the gorge itself. The relationship between Teller and Taylor-Joy is played entirely straight, the kind of saccharine, pseudo-quirky flirtation that would have been right at home in an indie romance from the 2010s. But it never meshes well with the horror or thriller elements, their relationship developing far too quickly, only to be violently punctuated by attacks from the Hollow Men. At over two hours long, it’s not short, but it feels like it never has enough time to develop any aspect enough, leaving some notable gaps in the plot and lore. Yet its tonal inconsistency is almost part of its charm, alongside some impressively creative creature designs. The Gorge isn’t necessarily good, but at least it’s never boring. 

5/10

Captain America: Brave New World

The fourth Captain America film sees Anthony Mackie’s high-flying Sam Wilson take over from Chris Evans’ Steve Rogers. When his friend Isaiah Bradley (Carl Lumbly) tries to kill the President, Sam investigates and find a conspiracy to spark a war between the US and Japan. There’s no doubt Mackie deserves a moment in the limelight, but the decision to emphasise the pressure on Sam restricts his natural charisma. So too does a deadly dull script, which features Navy SEALs unironically revealing they know someone who can analyse complex chemical compounds, whilst trying to shoehorn new and old figures from the MCU. The relationship between Wilson and Bradley is touching, and the action scenes take full advantage of the superhero silliness, but even Captain America can’t rise above dialogue this bad. 

4/10

The Monkey

Though trailers suggested a suspense filled-horror about a devilish toy monkey that kills people in numerous bizarre ways, the film itself is far sillier and less scary. When twins Hal and Brian realise that the toy is causing the horrific deaths around them, they bury it deep, only for it to resurface decades later, forcing a traumatised Hal to confront his fears. Director Osgood Perkins is mostly interested in coming up with the most amusingly gory deaths imaginable, and his script is shot through with a pleasant drollness. Unfortunately, when the deaths slow down, there’s not much of substance to keep audiences engaged. For aficionados of gore-soaked slasher films that specialise in creative endings for its characters, then The Monkey is a must watch. For me, it was an amusing enough time, with little lasting impact.

5/10

Mickey 17

The latest outing from Bong Joon-ho, best known for directing the Oscar winning Parasite, is a wacky dystopian satire about Mickey (Robert Pattinson), who has signed up to be cloned every time he dies, in return for passage off Earth. Pattinson plays numerous iterations of Mickey, from the meek Mickey 17 to the seemingly homicidal Mickey 18. There’s plenty to explore from that premise alone (for instance, watch Duncan Jones’ brilliant Moon), but Bong adds in critiques of imperialism, a knotty and under-explored relationship with security agent Nasha (Naomi Ackie), and Mark Ruffalo as a preening Trump parody. Yet despite its undeniable ambition, the script feels rushed, not helped by Pattinson’s voice-over, which provides far too much exposition and not enough laughs. Only Toni Collette seems to be on Bong’s level, as Ruffalo’s power-crazed, sauce obsessed wife, Lady Macbeth by way of pantomime. 

Given Bong’s superlative track record (he also made the underrated dystopian action movie Snowpiercer), there’s something disappointing about Mickey 17’s lack of depth. But I’m still grateful it got made, a silly, brash science fiction epic that gleefully mocks the excesses of capitalism and the far-right whilst throwing in adorable alien creatures. Is it over-stuffed? Perhaps. But thank god for directors like Bong Joon-ho who are willing to throw everything but the kitchen sink at ambitious, crowd-pleasing genre flicks.

6/10

Flow

The Oscar winning animation from Latvia has finally arrived in the UK, and by god was it worth the wait. Flow tells the story of a cat whose home has been flooded and is forced into a boat with small zoo’s worth of animals, including a sleepy capybara and a hoarding lemur. There’s no dialogue, and the sounds and movements of the animals are largely naturalistic. And yet this is not our world – not quite. There are giant statues of cats everywhere, and the animals adapt to sailing surprisingly quickly. 

At times Flow feels faintly dreamlike, a spiritual quest through a magical land. And yet the danger is all too real, as our protagonist faces drowning, starvation and threats from other creatures. The way the relationships between each of the animals develop over time, all without a word spoken, wrenches at the heart strings. All the while, the mystery of what causes the flood looms over everything. Whilst it’s never properly answered, the rapidly rising water levels speak volumes. 

There’s something transcendent about Flow’s simplicity, its effortless combination of naturalism and magic. Put simply, it’s the best film I’ve seen in recent years. A beautiful portrayal of nature, and the need to work together to survive.

10/10

The 2025 Natties

We’re back at the Natties! The last few years these most prestigious of awards have felt a little superfluous, given that the Academy had actually done a decent job. Fortunately (or unfortunately for some) they’re back to their old fumbling ways this year, nominating controversial films such as Emilia Pérez and The Brutalist and leaving out some major performances. 

So we’re back, celebrating the best films that were too straightforward, or just too much damn fun, for the Academy. 

Best Action Film

Nominees: Alien: Romulus, Gladiator II, Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga, Monkey Man, Rebel Ridge

As always, we start with a genre close to my heart that is usually ignored by the Academy. It was a solid if not spectacular year for action cinema. Rebel Ridge delivered an impressively restrained example of the genre in its tale of a former Marine versus a county of corrupt cops. Furiosa, the latest entry into the Mad Max series, would have been expected to walk away with this but ultimately only really delivered in its return to the Fury Road, with the ending proving to be underwhelming. But only Monkey Man felt like it really did something new with the genre, combining grim, guttural action with a spiritual through-line that elevated it. Dev Patel made this because he felt like he wasn’t being cast in action films – one can only hope that changes now.

Winner: Monkey Man

Best Popcorn Film

Nominees: Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, Drive-Away Dolls, Hit Man, Paddington in Peru, Venom: The Last Dance

There were plenty of ambitious films this year, but there weren’t many that managed the surprisingly tricky feat of being well made whilst still allowing you to turn your brain off. Paddington in Peru didn’t quite deliver on the promise of its predecessors, and part of the reason Venom: The Last Dance was so fun is that it’s not very well made. In the end, it was a close run thing between Drive-Away Dolls and Hit Man, with the former just winning out with its consistent absurdity and Margaret Qualley’s stupidly charming southern accent. But it was a very close run thing. 

Winner: Drive-Away Dolls

Horniest Film

Nominees: Challengers, Drive-Away Dolls, Hit Man, Love Lies Bleeding, Nosferatu

What a year for horny cinema. Challengers was a commercial and critical success. Drive-Away Dolls used a briefcase full of dildos as a MacGuffin. Love Lies Bleeding featured a lot of Katy O’Brian looking very muscular and sweaty whilst not wearing very much at all. But sometimes it’s about the chemistry more than the content itself, and Hit Man had that in spades. Glenn Powell and Adria Arjona sizzle as lovers who drag each other into ever more amoral acts – sin has never looked this good.

Winner: Hit Man

Best Soundtrack

Nominees: Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, Better Man, A Complete Unknown, Kneecap, A Quiet Place: Day One

This year we had not one, not two but three music biopics, so it was a good year for soundtracks. Kneecap’s music drives the film’s breathless momentum, whilst Better Man smartly reorganised some of Robbie Williams’ most popular songs. But although I didn’t think much of the film itself, no other movie gives the music as much room to breathe as A Complete Unknown. The simple beauty of Bob Dylan and Joan Baez’s music almost makes up for Dylan’s incessant assholery. You’ll be humming Dylan tunes for the rest of the week. 

Winner: A Complete Unknown

Most Memorable Performance

Nominees: Antonio Banderas (Paddington in Peru), Austin Butler (Dune: Part Two), Jesse Eisenberg (A Real Pain), Lupita Nyong’o (A Quiet Place: Day One), Zendaya (Challengers)

The Oscars have ignored a number of brilliant performances this year. Though Kieran Culkin’s portrayal of the charismatic depressive in A Real Pain has gained most of the plaudits, Eisenberg’s portrayal of his more introverted cousin deserves just as much, if not more, credit. Meanwhile, there were incredibly fun, over the top villain performances from Antonio Banderas and Austin Butler in Paddington in Peru and Dune: Part Two respectively. But Lupita Nyong’o’s role as the terminal cancer sufferer fighting, illogically, to stay alive during an alien invasion has been largely ignored, probably due to A Quiet Place: Day One being a horror prequel. Between this and Us, Nyong’o has cemented her position as THE modern scream queen, bringing strength and nuance to a role that has so often lacked it. With that and The Wild Robot under her belt, it’s been a hell of a year for her. 

Winner: Lupita Nyong’o (A Quiet Place: Day One)

Prettiest Film

Nominees: Civil War, Conclave, Inside Out 2, Nosferatu, The Wild Robot

Cinema is an inherently visual medium, and these films made the most of that. Civil War captured the stillness, clarity and horror of life as a war photographer, serving up countless unforgettable images. Meanwhile, Nosferatu combined gorgeous cinematography with incredible period costume design. Ultimately, though, this once again goes to an animated film, with The Wild Robot’s gorgeous portrayal of nature offering a solemn reminder of the importance of our environment. Simply watching the protagonist Ros transition from sleek, minimalist steel to a robot, dented and dirtied but richer for it, showcases how design can convey character development as well as any dialogue.

Winner: The Wild Robot

Most Emotional Film

Nominees: Blitz, Inside Out 2, His Three Daughters, Paddington in Peru, The Wild Robot

There’s nothing wrong with a good weepy. For many, films offer an opportunity for emotional release, especially in a world that pressures people to appear happy and professional at all times. Parenthood, in all its many forms, seemed to be a running theme this year. Steve McQueen’s Blitz may have been less angry than some of his other work, but the love between George and his mum, as well as the surprising decency of those around him, made it powerful. Paddington in Peru may be flawed, but the ending still manages to wring emotion out of the animated bear. But it was The Wild Robot’s tale of a robot learning the joys and hardships of motherhood that had me crying, on and off, for most of the last half hour. A deserving winner.

Winner: The Wild Robot

And that’s all folks! If you enjoyed this alternative awards piece, check out the winners of previous years in the links below.

Nate Rates | February 2025 roundup

A Complete Unknown

Bob Dylan is a musical legend, but what lies behind the legend? A Complete Unknown tries to answer that, only to find that behind the soulful, impassioned protest songs lies a smirking, wheedling trickster whose only real passion is self-mythologising. There’s no great pain, no righteous cause, no forbidden love. Dylan simply is what he appears to be…a very good song writer with a penchant for self-promotion. Mangold’s passion for the music shines through, and Chalamet (Dune) does a solid impression of the folk musician turned rocker, nailing his slouching figure and nasal tones. But there’s a nagging sense that the film (all 2 hours 20 of it) can be condensed into one line – fellow folk singer and lover Joan Baez telling Dylan “You’re kind of an asshole, Bob.” Where the Robbie Williams biopic Better Man was a surreal, exuberant rollercoaster that made me want to learn more about the former Take That member, A Complete Unknown left me wishing I knew less about Dylan. 

Great soundtrack though.

5/10

The Order

A atmospheric thriller, set amongst the soaring pines and rocky valleys of the northwest of America. Jude Law (Captain Marvel) plays Terry Husk, a haunted FBI agent hunting a neo-Nazi played by Nicholas Hoult (Nosferatu), who has a plan to overthrow the US government. There are obvious links to modern politics, made explicit by a brief text at the end, but director Justin Kurzel seems more interested in just building a solid sense of suspense. Husk occasionally veers into cliched territory, but Jude Law’s bristling moustache and gloriously receding hairline lend the character a gravitas that sets him apart. Hoult emanates a steely intensity as the zealot, even as the setting and score create an eerie edge that just about covers the more on-the-nose elements of the script. 

7/10

Conclave

This thriller about the choosing of a new Pope manages to make a group of old men slowly deliberating fascinating. Stéphane Fontaine’s cinematography stunningly captures all the excess and artifice of the Vatican, and there are strong performances from Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci, and Lucian Msamati. But there’s a sense that Conclave is pulling its punches, both in regards to its protagonist and the Catholic Church in general. Much of the drama comes from a number of scandalous reveals about the papal candidates, but they seem tame compared to what we know about the rampant child abuse and subsequent coverups that high ranking members of the church took part in. Likewise, the film never tries to highlight the hypocrisy Fiennes’ adjudicator, even as he claims objectivity whilst steering the process to suit his own ends. It’s all treated with the utmost seriousness, but it would have been braver (not to mention more fun) to make a straight up satire. Instead, it falls to Sergio Castellitto’s pantomime baddie Cardinal Tedesco to bring some vital spark to affairs. Conclave is a solidly crafted film, but it could have been so much more had it been willing to break from doctrine.

7/10